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Wednesday, December 5, 2012

My Own Worst Enemy.

Can I get an "Amen!" from all you cat owners?  I have three cats - and somehow, they have ended up being:  all male, all black and white, all three sizes:  small, medium, x-large.  One specializes in mice and plastic bags.  One specializes in feats of acrobatic daring and theft of loose objects.  One specializes in eating anything that doesn't move faster than he does and trying to get Bernice to lick his head.

Very early this morning, I start to hear the objects hitting the floor.  The size and composition vary from morning to morning.  This morning's sounded plastic.  Lots of high, squeaking sounds as whatever it was  was scraped along the floor.  I put the pillow over my head and went tried to go back to sleep.

Not long afterward, I gave up and got up.  It had started raining and I was tempted to let the cats out with the dogs. They are all hot-to-trot to get out anyway.  Kidding.  As I stumbled around in the dark, looking for the light, I kicked something.  Turns out that Medium (aka Onceslim) had unearthed a plastic container of catnip from gawdknowswhere.  There were numerous fang marks on the container, but the lid had stayed on.  Amazing!

Before I had my first cup of coffee (this is an important part of the story...) I thought, "Oh, FINE.  You want this catnip?  You want it?  Well, HERE!"  Then I proceeded to sprinkle a liberal amount over their scratching wave.  Then I had my coffee.

Ten minutes later, I am sitting here listening to howling, mewling, whacking, flipping, drooling, and a variety of indescribable things going on in the living room.

I am, indeed, my own worst enemy.

17 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Mel - Oh, fine! Very easy for YOU to laugh from the comfort of your (almost) cat-free living room...

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  2. I always wonder......would I sleep until 8 AM if I didn't have a cat doing the 5K around my body at 4 AM?

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    1. Sylvie - Wouldn't it be nice to find out? :)

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  3. A-flippin-men, girl. Most hilarious story I've read in awhile! :) (Next time have the coffee BEFORE you deal with the catnip!)

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    1. MamaTea - It's the drooling that really gets to me. Cat drool is grossomundo.

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  4. Ut-oh, Susan you were a glutten for punishment this morning.
    I agree with MamaTea coffee before catnip.

    Have a great day!

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    1. Sandy - Must.have.coffee.first. I hope you have a great day as well!

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  5. I dont have cats anymore, but they certainly entertain when high on catnip!

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    1. SLF - Well, I have an extra (or three) I can send you......:)

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  6. ROFL. We actually put our cat in a spare bedroom at bedtime, where her cat box is, and there's water. She loves her blankie in there. As soon as Dave's up it's "meow, meow", then she eats, then she cries outside our door til Dave lets her in to wake me up. If I'd only known. We had to start doing that after the 5 a.m. meowing on the weekends. Ah well, atleast she loves her mommy! She never meows for Dave, only for the food he feeds her :) She loves catnip too!

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    1. Nancy - It's amazing how quickly they can get you under their power, isn't it? I have one very verbal cat - he squeaks at me all morning until I pick him up, then he immediately wants down.

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  7. LOLOL! This was hysterical. Cats! Never a dull moment.

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