Borrowing my title from Mama Pea's comment, I live in a not-so-peaceable kingdom. I am held captive by the goats - any movement from the house, ANY movement, causes bleating from the goats. This gets the sheep going. I find myself creeping on tiptoe out of the back door and sidling along the house, hugging the outer walls and woodpile, in order to reach the chickens unseen by sheep or goat.
On the poultry side of the farm, Penelope (Penny the turkey) is chirping forlornly and loudly since she seems to have just noticed that she is a turkey and NOT a chicken and calls for a tom to come save her from this lonesome existence almost incessantly. This has caused Dotty (Specked Sussex) to get her undies in a twist. Loudly. The two Ameracaunas are never silent - they are either carrying on because someone is in "their" nesting box, or The Monster (moi) has entered the coop, or the crows have entered the yard, or a foreign bit of vegetation has blown into the yard.
Bleu has overcome his shyness and crows ever three minutes. Luckily, he is still not aggressive with the hens. Unluckily, he still has his cap set for Penny.
There are new neighbors on the road with dogs. Lots of dogs. They march their dogs up and down the road in front of the house, which has Scrappy in a frenzy of barking and shoving as many of his toys in his mouth as possible - just in case the interlopers may try to storm the house and take them. At least they muffle the sound. As soon as Scrappy barks, Lovey, the back-up band, starts her usual chirping and shrieking (she does not bark like a normal dog - she's 'special').
All we need is a full orchestra and a steel drum band.