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Tuesday, February 3, 2015

And the fun times, they just keep coming!

After slogging through the weekend and getting one precious, single, instagram, beautiful, few hours of sun, no wind, and non-subzero temps, everything just went to Toledo in a handbag.  I follow the weather forecast almost like a religion.  Or one of those British soap operas that everyone gets addicted to.  You can have your Dowton Abbey - just please leave me to my 10-minutes-after-the-hour-weather-update.  The fact that I keep believing these nimrods makes me realize why the folks at Mensa are not beating down my door.  All weekend, I heard dire predictions of another oncoming snowmageddon.  Pooh-pooh, sez I.  MY weather guy said it was going to be waaaay too far south to bring us much grief.

As I sat at the Firehouse Breakfast on Sunday, listening to school bus drivers (there always seems to be a preponderance of school bus drivers at these things) chortling about their upcoming snow day, I pooh-poohed again.

Then I woke up at 4A Monday morning to six inches of snow and a forecast of snow - with wind - all day long.  Luckily, our office decided to officially close, so I won't be using every one of my vacation days shoveling snow.  I hope.  It's only the first week of February, after all.  And don't get me started on the idiotic devotion to the shadow/no shadow of an entitled rodent.

So, I shoveled.  And shoveled again.  And again.  I took ibuprofen and shoveled some more.  We ended up with over a foot.  There was so much blowing snow, that I didn't get my mail because the postman couldn't reach my postbox.  I gave the chickens a good 15 minute pep talk, which I had to take back this morning, when the thermometer registered a high of -15*.  Instead, I apologized for living in the Northeast, for the fact that I couldn't refill their heated waterer because the lid was frozen on, for the fact that I couldn't take the wool blanket down from the window to let more light in.  For the fact that they are forced to live wingtip-to-wingtip for another three days.

Then I went out to deliver the same mea culpa to the sheep.  But, just before I reached them, I fell.  In waist deep snow.  While it was nice to have such a nice cushion, it posed a problem.  I was geared up for the weather - thermal boots, lined chinos, thermal Carhartts, down parka, double mittens, dork hat, scarf.  I could not move.  As I lay there, looking up into the frigid sky, I contemplated my options.  Then I halibuted around for a while, until I wound up on hands and knees.  Then I did my best imitation of a winter inch worm and made it over to the fence.  Where three pair of ovine eyes were contemplating me with alarm.  The camelid eyes are too cloudy to contemplate much.  I hauled myself up, brushed the snow off and continued with morning chores.

Then I came inside and got ready for my slip-slidey trip over the mountains to my 9 o'clock mammogram.

There is no end to the fun around here...

35 comments:

Sue said...

Good grief.
You need a nice condo..........some place warm.

Pioneer Woman at Heart said...

I feel your pain about the shoveling. I have to shovel out our mailbox too, and it sits more than a few feet off the highway, so all that wet heavy stuff the giant snowplows graciously give me, gets shoveled and shoveled. Yesterday, our dog Alias got stuck in a snowdrift, while out doing his business, I felt sorry for the poor guy. We are to get more snow too. Hang in there! Get some rest too.

jaz@octoberfarm said...

i cracked up as soon as i real your post title!

Susan said...

I remember old timers talking about tying a rope from house to barn. It was something to hold on to and they could follow it back in a blizzard. I expect you are a constant source of wonder to your farm residents.

Sandy Livesay said...

Susan,

My dear friend, this is why I refuse to move back home up in Marquette, Michigan (not to far from Canada). When we had snow and storms it was all kinds of work just to get out the door. That's not counting feeding animals, shoveling, attempting to get the car out of the garage because the darn door froze shut.
We live in Oklahoma (transferred here because of hubby's job) and we get some snow storms occasionally but no where near the ones you get. Then we have to deal with tornadoes.

Do you by chance have a snow blower to help with the snow removal? Or a neighbor who may have one to borrow.

Stay warm, don't over work with shoveling. I know advil/motrin comes in handy when shoveling. I'm happy to hear you weren't hurt when you fell, well maybe your pride was when trying to figure out how on earth you were going to get back up on your feet with all of the winter clothing. Just remember, the only ones watching when you fell were the 3 ovine and they were laughing with you, not at you :-)

Be careful driving the mountain in the morning for your mammogram appointment.

P.S......those weather people have it all wrong!!!!

thecrazysheeplady said...

"went to Toledo" Love it :-). I'd love your snow, but you can keep the temps!

Mama Pea said...

Yup, no doubt about it. You really know how to have fun. And then to be able to go have a mammogram on top of it! Whadda gal.

I have experienced falling off the trail while on X-country skis and being in much the same predicament. Try doing your halibuting and inch worming with your boots pinned to six foot long pieces of boards. You just wanna call for a helicopter to come winch you up and away.

Susan said...

Sue - The sad part about this is that, while a condo sounds sooooo good right now, I would be climbing the walls in a week. There is no keeping me happy.

Susan said...

Susan - That is a great idea! Leave it to those old-timers! I had a good laugh at your last line - I don't even want to imagine what they are thinking.

Susan said...

Sandy - You were up in the hinterlands, that's for sure! Of course, I don't know what would make me more nervous - horrendous snow storms or tornadoes. I just slog along with my little shovel, creaking upright every now and then. I'm trying to look at it as good cardio exercise - something that's hard to come by in the winter.

Susan said...

TCSL - Amen to the temps! I don't mind snow as much as these subzero temperatures. They make me want to come down there and snuggle with Hank! :)

Susan said...

Mama Pea - While I love the 'idea' of x-country skiing, I am way too uncoordinated to ever pull it off. I have snowshoes, which I use in extreme weather, but they have their own limitations. Especially when you have a large, pony-like sheep that likes to be right behind you. Stops me in my tracks every time!

MrsDuncanMahogany said...

I am guilty of being a Coronation Street addict AND a weather channel watcher *ahem*. Oooh and I would gladly trade you the middle of the Canadian prairies for the northeastern part of the US. :) While I can barely type thru the tears of laughter at your misfortune (sorry, just picturing the halibutting around in the snow whilst ovine eyes watch and wonder what that other ovine is doing in the snow) I can totally get the joy of it all. Put me in a condo and I too would climb the walls. I just need to make the leap....one day I am sure of it!

Susan said...

Kristina - I feel for Alias. Pepper gets stuck constantly, so I have to go out in parka and robe at the crack of dawn so he can do his business outside. Shoveling through the pile up by the plows is hard work!

Susan said...

Jaz - If I'm not laughing, I may be crying in my soup.

Susan said...

Mrs DM - Isn't it funny how I immediately got all warm and fuzzy, thinking about the Canadian prairie? I think I spent too much time reading Laura Ingalls.

DFW said...

Oh my gosh. I can't relate at all but what you describe is my ever lasting fear of having to work in conditions like that. However, I'll be downright jealous of your conditions come July/August when we can't breathe for the heat & humidity & usually no wind to boot.

Tyche's Minder said...

LOL. Did you ever see the news report circulating on facebook about Icelandic sheep that get buried in snowdrifts in Iceland? They use dogs to find them after particularly bad storms. I remember one sheep they found -- alive -- after 19 days. Buried, but alive. Sigh, if only we were our Icelandic sheep. Sure, we'd be crazy in general, but we'd also be totally unfazed by whatever the weather through at us.

Buttons Thoughts said...

I am sorry I am laughing I have no idea why I like you and feel your pain. I wish I lived closer I have a big tractor and know how to use it:):) Take care. Hug B

Laurie said...

I'm sorry for your troubles, but if you didn't have these mishaps, I would have nothing to laugh at....well, that might be an exaggeration. But.....hahahaha! Did you ever watch the movie "Home Alone", the first one? Do you remember the scene where the little boy shoots the gun through the doggy door into the groin of one of the burglars? The one where he falls over, moaning and holding himself and the other guy is oblivious to what just happened and yells, "What, what is it"? That scene sort of reminded me of you falling in the snow. The sheep was probably saying, "Who.....what....Nancy, what are you doing"? Hahaha!

Unknown said...

ROFL, sorry! I could see myself doing that, and with sheep watching! Hang in there :)

Spiderjohn said...

Susan, Sue is wrong. You don't need a "condo". You need a man! Or at least someone there with you. What if you had fallen and couldn't get up?

Tami said...

I can just see that moment {{laughing}}. Great story! Hey..it could be ice instead :0

Susan said...

DFW - What a coincidence! I tend to start to think longingly about snow right about the same time!

Susan said...

TM - OMG. That does not surprise me in the least bit. Those short, broad sheep are not put off in the slightest by two feet of snow. They just plod through. Usually, by spring time, when I look in the mirror, I am reminded of Icelandic sheep.

Susan said...

Buttons - At least you and your tractor could dig me out! :)

Susan said...

Laurie - Don't worry, I am laughing along with you. It's the only thing that keeps me sane during the winter. I do remember that movie - one of the best. Too bad they felt the need to make sequels... I believe the sheep are thinking, "Who the heck will bring our hay if that two-legged being does not get up?"

Susan said...

Nancy - Wish I could send you some of this snow. I could ship two feet and we'd still have plenty!

Susan said...

SJ - Well, tell me something I don't already know.... :) Unless you are volunteering... I may just design a hat to wear, where there is a bright orange flag that shoots straight up so that I may be located in a snowdrift. Or...I will just string a line from house to barn like the old timers and clip myself on. Sort of like one of those dog lines. Hey.....

Susan said...

Tami - You are so right. I am glad that the sheet ice is now covered by a foot of snow.

Sandy Livesay said...

Susan,

It's definitely a good cardio work out shovel snow. Be careful, and kick that snows butt!!!!

Fiona said...

Snow angels? Well sort of. I remember my first winter working on a cattle ranch in Saskatchewan....I had so many layers on I could not bend my leg enough to climb into the tractor! Oh then I had t o pee....argh! They do say if it doesn't freeze your Katushka....you will be stronger for it? Hang in there!

Cat Eye Cottage said...

It makes me think of A Christmas Story. I feel bad for whining that the high today only reached in the 50s and it's overcast.

Casa Mariposa said...

I am dying for a huge, whomping storm but it probably won't come. :( I hope your Big Squish went ok.

small farm girl said...

I had to laugh when you talked about being stuck in the snow. I have been there before too. Unless someone has ever done this, they just don't understand. It actually gets kind of scary. LOL. I can remember looking up at the sky, also, and wondering what in the world am I going to do. I finally got out too, but it wasn't pretty.
Hope everything is better for you up there. I'll just stay "snowless" down here in KY. (Now watch us get hammered by a blizzard.)